Overall not a total stinker. I enjoyed some performances, and hey, it was a short show! Here are my thoughts on the proceedings:
Is Nicki Minaj’s butt real?
Cuz her figure is just cartoonish.
I think it’s worse than Kim Kardashian.
And btw, with Nicki and Kim in attendance, plus Iggy Azalea, J.Lo and
Beyonce, there is a lot of a** in that room.
Does the country music world still claim Taylor Swift at
all? Cuz the girl is full-on pop
now. And her new song is waaayyy pop. I thought it was Katy Perry on the radio the
other day. Nope, just Taylor.
What is there to say about Sam Smith? His voice is amazing! I love that song “Lay with Me.” Not really feeling his other songs
though. It’s the Adele syndrome for
me: I love your voice but not many of
your songs. Oh, and he looks like a young Boy George sans makeup. For real.
I used to love Usher’s music, but I just don’t anymore. The last 2 or 3 albums just haven’t done it
for me.
OMG, Nicki Minaj is guesting on this Usher song too. That’s the 3rd time she’s
performed tonight. Enough already.
On-the-rise boy band 5 Seconds of Summer (currently opening
for One Direction on their stadium tour) is a real band. I did not know that. They all play instruments.
Oh look, Taylor
is dancing in her seat (to Iggy Azalea).
At least she isn’t standing this time.
I mean, she’s always in the front row and she’s like 5’10” already before
she puts her heels on. So she needs to
stay seated.
Not feeling Demi Lovato’s new look.
Glad Adam Levine isn’t blond anymore. That was not a good
look on him.
That stupid Miley Cyrus video Wrecking Ball won video of the
year?!?! Really? I never watched it (on principal—she is
sickening). Is it artistically
worthy? Oh wait, Miley is having her
date accept for her. Turns out he’s a
homeless youth speaking on behalf of that group. It’s nice that Miley’s trying to bring
awareness and all (apparently you can go to her website for more info), but she
looks so fake when the camera pans to her during the boy’s speech. Hopefully her tears and feelings are genuine
even if they didn’t look it.
Is Katy Perry friends with Sam Smith? Her arm is propped up on his back, so I hope
so. She and Riffraff (whom I’ve never
heard of but he’s a Houston
rapper, featured on her latest remix apparently) look ridiculous in their
matching Versace demin ensembles, but she did say they were paying homage to
Britney and Justin’s equally ridiculous denim ensembles from the VMAs of
yore. I respect the throwback mockery. He also looks ridiculous (cornrows and a
grill) independent of the denim get-up.
I think Beyonce is getting the Vanguard award, which is a
cumulative award for your body of work.
So why is she only doing her new stuff?
I like her new stuff, but I looovve her old stuff. I can admit the new stuff is just very
unconventional and downright weird at times, and I can see casual listeners
thinking it sounds like noise because it’s so different (the melodies, the
phrasing, etc.).
Just saw Jay-Z in the audience holding Blue Ivy, no
headphones in sight. Isn’t that a
no-no? Usually singing celebs make sure
their babies/toddlers have headphones at concerts to protect their young
ears. Heck, sometimes I think I oughta have
them to protect my middle-aged ears.
I take back what I said about Bey’s booty earlier. Her butt is a shadow of its former self. Compared to the other booties on deck, hers
is not impressive anymore. But she’s
more talented and successful than those other chicks, so there’s that. I never thought she’d lose enough weight to
lose her badunkadunk, but she did. She’s
not Taylor Swift-flat or anything, but her body is no longer too bootylicious for
ya, babe. (For the record, J.Lo's butt ain't what it used to be either. KK, Iggy and Nicki make Bey and J look downright unimpressive.)
Speaking of Taylor Swift, she finally stood up (on Bey’s
last song) and she’s basically wearing a leotard. Not for a performance but as her outfit. Does she think she’s Gaga now? (And since she was kind enough to pose over-the-shoulder, you can do a butt comparison to Bey!)
So Jay, still holding Blue Ivy, presented the award to Bey,
who started crying. I hope this isn’t
all for show to prove their marriage is solid.
Time will tell.
I think the show actually ended early, like 15-20 minutes
early. Well, I never…
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