Golden Globes 2014: Reflections

 

RED CARPET

 First up on the red carpet, Zooey Deschanel.  Just when I was all set to fast forward over her, Ryan (Seacrest) asked about Prince’s upcoming guest spot on the post-Superbowl ep of New Girl. You have my attention now, Ms. Deschanel.

“Girls” Lena Dunham looks a little better than usual, but her dress is a little too form-fitting for a less-than-fit form, if you get my drift.  Nothing wrong with being chunky, but dress for you body, girl.  And the huge, hideous arm tattoo…ugh.  That's her in the yellow.

 People show up so early these days!  I remember when you couldn’t hope to see anyone you remotely cared about for at least 30 minutes into a red carpet broadcast. 

30 minutes in, and I’ve already noticed 3 ladies wearing nude dresses, so I guess that’s a trend tonight.  I’m sure Joan Rivers and her crew will confirm this on E!’s Fashion Police tomorrow night.  (Yes, of course I always watch the fashion review of the red carpet. Duh. I’m very thorough in my awards viewing.  Pre-shows, post-shows, fashion reviews.  I’m committed.  Or maybe I should be committed.  Tomato, To-mah-toe.  Shrug.)

Lot of red shades of dress coming down the carpet too.

Kerry Washington looks terrific all dressed up and preggers.  (and wearing a nude color btw)

I don’t think I’ve seen anyone truly hideous yet.  I must be forgetting someone…

Aw, it’s an “Aviator” reunion—Cate Blanchett and Leo DiCaprio.  I’m reminded that I never got around to seeing that movie.

Oh good—Bradley Cooper looks like Bradley Cooper again.  No more American Hustle perm.  But he’s overbaked (too tan).

Ooh, the fashion police is gonna get you, Emma Watson, for wearing pants to a formal event. And they don’t look like formal pants. But she’s cute as a button, as always.

Melissa McCarthy’s dress is better than usual, I guess, but still nothing to write home about.

Matthew McConaughey is looking pretty good.  Makes me wonder if he’s wearing makeup b/c he’s always been a good-looking guy, but his age has been showing lately.  

How has Sofia Vergara been allowed to hold onto that thick Colombian accent all these years in Hollywood?  I can’t believe no one made her take elocution lessons or whatever kind of speech training they do to drop accents.  She’d be so much more marketable if she could act with or without the accent. It’s limiting. “Modern Family” can’t run forever.

So many pregnant ladies on the red carpet tonight:  Drew Barrymore, Olivia Wilde, Kerry Washington.  They can have their own segment on Fashion Police.  Kerry looked fab; Olivia looked good too; Drew not so much.  Her dress is too busy for any woman, and doubly so for a woman sporting a bump.  (Fun Fact: Olivia Wilde’s birth name was Olivia Cockburn, so you can see why she changed that.)

Julia Roberts looks like she’s wearing a strapless gown…over a white collared, button-down shirt.  Kinda weird. 

Sandra Bullock has no boobs.  Just an observation.  Actually I guess it’s not much of an observation.  Good for her, not having implants. (see below)

Jennifer Lawrence is fangirling over Taylor Swift.  TS kinda annoys me, so I’m not all that enthused.  JLaw's new pixie ’do is adorable.

OMG—Jennifer Lawrence just dropped a piece of her expensive, borrowed jewelry!  DO NOT lose the jewelry, girl!

Ick—Chris Pine (new Star Trek movies, new Jack Ryan) has a beard.  I hope that’s for a role and not for real.

It is amazing how all these women in their 40’s and beyond maintain their svelte figures.  They must be miserable and hungry all the time.  B/c you know their metabolism has slowed down and fat just wants to settle into undesirable areas.  (I know of which I speak, lemme tell ya.)

Zoe Saldana seems really sweet.  I don’t know why this is surprising to me.

During the Globes Arrival Show they just flashed Melissa McCarthy’s name over a shot of Matthew McConaughey.  Ha ha ha!  Same initials, both last names start with Mc-.  Just a McStake (you see what I did there?).

THE SHOW

I love how hosts Tina and Amy get the bigshots in the audience participate in their comic bits.

Let's check out some of Tina's best jokes.  (Sorry, Amy, I love you, but Tina was funnier.)

Tina:  “Gravity,” is the story of how George Clooney would rather float away into space and die than spend one more moment with a woman his own age.  Priceless! 

Tina:  For [Matthew McConaughey’s] role in “Dallas Buyers Club,” he lost 45 lbs, or as actresses call it “being in a movie.” 

Tina:  We’re gonna get this show done in 3 hours, or as Martin Scorcese likes to call it, “Act 1.”

Apparently “Wolf of Wall Street” used the f-word 506 times.  Holy f***!

Having now seen the bottom of Sandra Bullock’s dress, I no longer notice her lack of boobage.  Only the ugliness of her dress.

I will always hate that the Globes just lop all the tv supporting actors/actresses—comedy, drama and miniseries—into one category.  These people should not be up against each other.  Does it cost them something to have separate categories?  Puhleeze.

Jacqueline Bisset just gave a horrible, rambling speech. It had a few good moments, but overall it was a mess.  They’re trying to play her off, and she’s still talking.  If the recipient is saying something worthwhile, this is endearing.  In this instance, it is not endearing.  Sit down and shut up. 

How is this only Elisabeth Moss’ 2^nd nomination?  The Globes haven’t been nominating her for “Mad Men”?  Only once apparently.  Booooo!

See and now they’re trying to play off Elisabeth Moss, and I’m pissed.  It’s absurd that this is only her 2^nd nod to begin with.  So orchestra, you can shut up this time and let her finish!

Paula Patton (aka Mrs. Robin Thicke) is beautiful.  But her blush is a little heavy, and that gigantic ruffle weaving its way down the left side of her body (shoulder to knee) is also excessive.

I wonder if Bryan Cranston (“Breaking Bad”) will miss shaving his head now that the show is over?

The tv people are forced to sit in the back of the room like second-class citizens, while all the movie stars are up front.  Consequently, it takes forever for them to get up to the podium.

Joaquin Phoenix has a beard and a ponytail.  Because just one of those wasn’t enough.

Jon Voight just won.  Good thing this is an off-year for Brangelina so as to avoid tension.  Jon and Angie’s relationship seem to run very hot and cold.

Amongst the nominees for Best Actress in a tv drama, we have the woman from “Orphan Black,” the woman from “Orange is the New Black,” and from “Scandal” Kerry Washington, who happens to be black.  (If you say it with the right intonation, it works.)

None of the “Black/black” nominees won; Robin Wright did.  And kudos to 47-year-old Robin Wright (the former Mrs. Sean Penn), who also recently announced her engagement to 33-year-old Ben Foster.  He’s not very attractive, but he is a good actor and he’s 14 years her junior, so there’s that.  And he gets to marry the Princess Bride.  Everybody wins.

 

 

Presenter Jim Carrey is still funny even if he doesn’t make great movies anymore.  (Does he?)

So much, nay too much, facial hair on the men in the room.

Like Joaquin, Jared Leto is sporting a beard and a ponytail.  Unlike Joaquin, it works for him.  He’s a rock star after all (lead singer of 30 Seconds to Mars).  Plus he’s always way more attractive than Joaquin. 

Whoa—Colin Farrell is all spiffed up and looking fine.

They are trying to play everyone off.  So rude!  Like it’s the end of the world if an awards show runs over a little.  We kind of expect it. 

Awards I just can’t bring myself to care about:  best foreign film and animated film.  I don’t watch ‘em, so I don’t care about their awards.  Sorry.

Daenarys (sp?) aka Khaleesi from "Game of Thrones" is unrecognizable as a brunette.  Every time I see her, I’m like “who’s that?”

What is up with Rob Lowe’s hair?  The sides (and maybe back) are cut very close, and it’s still full on top, kinda spiked upward.  It’s weird, but it makes him look younger.  And he was already looking pretty good.

The Cecil B. DeMille award is going to Woody Allen.  Oy.  I’m not a fan, which is actually great b/c I can fast-forward over some of this.  It’s always such a long segment.

Oh look—Diane Keaton is wearing a suit and tie.  Shocking.

Why isn’t Woody there to accept this award?  Crap.  They probably explained it, but I fast forwarded.  Oh, well, I’m sure I’ll read about it tomorrow.

Double crap.  I’ve caught up to live tv.  Unacceptable. 

It’s always amusing when the Globes shower attention on shows/movies/performances that really aren’t getting recognition elsewhere.  This year it’s the film “Wolf of Wall Street” & star Leo DiCaprio and tv show “Brooklyn Nine-Nine” & its star Andy Samberg.  The Hollywood Foreign Press (whoever the heck they are) sometimes have weird taste, and it makes it hard to take them seriously.  I don’t even lend much credence to winning a GG anymore.  A critics choice award or a SAG award has more prestige and serves as a better indicator of Oscar success.  Just sayin’.  And while “Wolf” has some critics love, it has no SAG nominations.  We’ll see what Oscar says later this week when their noms come out.

Aw, it’s another “Aviator” reunion as Leo presents Cate Blanchett’s award.  Her speech was smart and funny, just like Cate.  Love her.

Matthew McConaughey started his speech with the immortal words, “All right, all right, all right.”  No, seriously—that’s the first thing he said!  I can’t talk about Sofia’s accent and ignore Matt’s highly recognizable drawl.  How did he play a Northerner in “Amistad”? How did that work?

Johnny Depp is blond.  With his boyish, floppy-hair style, he looks like a surfer dude.  I’m not loving the blond, but he is a still a mighty fine piece of man.  That chiseled face.  Umph.

 

It amuses me that the writer/director of “12 Years a Slave”—a black Brit—has the same name as supercool man’s man movie icon—white American—Steve McQueen.  (Fun Fact: “12 Years” stars Chiewetel Ejiofor, Michael Fassbender & Benedict Cumberbatch are also Brits.  The Brit and Aussie ability to mimic American accents is nothing short of astounding.  Yet Sofia Vergara and Matt McConaughey can’t cover their accents!)

Until we meet again (which will probably be the Oscars)…

 

 

The Oscars: My Superbowl

As always, I apologize for type-o’s, omissions, etc. I watched the E! preshow, the ABC preshow, the Oscar telecast itself and the E! postshow. I am serious about Oscar!  The dvr allowed me to fast-forward through impertinent material.  The dvr has simplified and enhanced my Oscar viewing experience.  I even managed to watch Watching Dead last night once I initially caught up with the live broadcast. Now that’s what I call effective time management, baby!

RED CARPET PRE-SHOWS

What are you doing at the Oscars?

Lori Singer – Seriously, has she done something since Footloose?  And I’m talking about the 1984 original, not the recent remake. Never liked her. She wasn’t worthy of Ren (Kevin Bacon).

Zoe Saldana – Are she and Best Actor nominee & Sexiest Man Alive (1 year removed) Bradley Cooper on or off as a couple right now?

Channing Tatum – Reigning Sexiest Man Alive. Does one get invited just for holding that title?

Daniel Radcliffe, Chris Evans, Jennifer Aniston, Kristen Stewart

Apparently some of these random folks may be in some skits onstage. Should be interesting.

MORE RED CARPET REFLECTIONS

People show up so early now!  Two hours before showtime, nominee Jessica Chastain is there. Former winner Reese Witherspoon is there too.

Quvenzhane Wallis (9-year-old Best Actress nominee) is so cute in her evening gown. And she has a furry dog purse. Just a little girl…on the Oscar red carpet.  And next she gets to play Annie in Will Smith’s remake. 

Octavia Spencer looks beautiful.  Nice to see a real-sized woman actually dressed well for her body type.  Of course, it doesn’t hurt that it looks like she lost some weight too. That or her Spanx is working really well. Maybe a combination of both.

And hear comes Melissa McCarthy. Love her, but she pretty much never dresses her real-sized body well.  Why, Melissa, why???  And her hair is like a lion’s mane.

Bradley Cooper brought his mom. All together now, awwwwww.

I really don’t see a lot of fashion faux pas tonight. Almost everyone looks great!

Pale colors and whites seem to be a big trend tonight.

Charlize Theron is rocking that ultra-short pixie ’do like nobody’s business.  Like Halle Berry, she’s one of the few women who looks better with less hair. Too much hair just distracts from how ridiculous beautiful they are.

Hugh Jackman’s wife is wearing a pantsuit. You’re on the arm of a Best Actor nominee on the Oscar red carpet. Kick it up a notch!

Is Adele tall? She looks like a giant next to Kristin Chenoweth. Perhaps Adele is on a stand, and maybe Kristin kicked her shoes off.  I know KC is super tiny, but I didn’t think of Adele as unusually tall.  Can’t wait to hear her sing.  Not.

Okay, Anne Hathaway looks like a giant next to KC also. But that I expected. I do think Anne is rather tall for a girl.

Jamie Foxx’s daughter is gorgeous. I remember her being a somewhat little girl (around 10—was it that long ago?!) when he won his Oscar for Ray.  Now she’s 19, in college and all grown up.

Jamie Foxx told Kelly Rowland he’s always had a crush on her, and she got all flustered. Kinda sweet.  Also maybe a little inappropriate (I need to check on the age differential there…)

Wow, Renee Zellweger.  Haven’t seen her in ages.  What the hell was the last movie she did?!  Sadly that Supporting Actress curse may have claimed her.

OSCAR CEREMONY

Seth McFarlane’s monologue is going well, right outta the gate. He got Tommy Lee Jones to smile immediately! Somewhere Tina Fey and Amy Poehler are green with envy.

I love Seth’s references to other awards show moments from this season.

Seth has a pretty nice singing voice.

Channing Tatum and Charlize Theron ballroom dancing.  Lovely. (Now we know why CT was there.)

And here comes Daniel Radcliffe with more Old Hollywood song-and-dance.

I just realized: Sally Field won 2 Oscars (Norma Rae & Places in the Heart) and like so many actresses-of-a-certain-age (and more recently actors, as well) turned to tv, starring as the matriarch on Brothers and Sisters for like 5 years. The show ended, she made Lincoln, and now she’s nominated again. You can come home again. 

Joaquin Phoenix, please do something to improve your look.  I’m not sure what, just something.

Wow—all of the Supporting Actor nominees are past winners. That’s gotta lessen the pain of losing.

Yay, Christoph Waltz wins! I like him. He’s such a charming little European man. And Django Unchained was off the chain! (Get it?! But in all seriousness, I loved it.  Viva Quentin Tarantino.)

Oh, good grief, Jack Nicholson. Still with the bed-head and the sunglasses sitting down front at the Oscars. Comb your hair and take off the shades.

John Travolta and Paul Rudd, what’s up with your hair?

Melissa McCarthy and Paul Rudd, your banter is flopping hard.

This Life of Pi clip is kinda making me wish I’d seen it.

I hope Quevenzhane Wallis doesn’t cry when she loses. I always wonder how these young kids keep it together in competitive Hollywood.

The winning cinematographer for Life of Pi sounds like a rambling idiot. And he looks like an aging lead singer of an 80’s hair band. The latter is the real offense.

They totally cut off the Life of Pi visual effects guy during his acceptance speech. Beyond rude! I know some of these folks are kinda dull, but ya need to let them have their moment. (Of course, it’s easy for me to say that as I fast-forward over such drivel.)

Oh, a Bond tribute. How nice. Fast-forwarding…

I’m seeing a lot of missed opportunities to pan to audience members for reaction shots as Seth zings them. Wake up, camera guys.

A segment on the 21^st century resurgence of musicals. Catherine Zeta-Jones did a fine job with All That Jazz from Chicago, but J.Hud got the standing o for And I’m Telling You I’m Not Going from Dreamgirls.  Les Mis got a standing o also, but I mean, how could they not?  The whole freakin’ cast is up there!  It was pretty impressive. Poor CZJ got the short end of the stick going first.

Zoe Saldana’s purpose is revealed: she’s (Uhura) presenting with Chris Pine (Captain Kirk) to promote the upcoming Star Trek movie.

Ted (yes, the movie bear) is presenting with Mark Wahlberg.  I didn’t care to see it, but it made a buttload of money and a lot of people thought it was hilarious, so I watched it on the plane ride home from Dubai. I was underwhelmed.

Skyfall and Zero Dark Thirty tie for best sound editing. And one of the winners seems to be another aging 80’s hair band rocker. Why won’t these old dudes cut their hair?!

The Sound of Music bit had me in stitches!!! Audible guffaws. Doesn’t get any better than that.

The Princess Bride is now an Academy Award Winner. How far she’s come. I know you’re somewhat overcome, Anne Hathaway, but you better speed this up before the band plays you off.

Blech. Here comes Adele. At least this dress is way better than than hideous shoud’ve-been-drapery dress she wore to the Grammys.  But is that all her hair, or does she have some filler in there?  It’s looking very full. Fast forwarding now…

How cute. They had the wizard (Harry Potter) present with the fangbanger-turned-vamp Bella (Twilight). 

The acceptance speeches are not very good this year. Hopefully the winners for best screenplay will fix that. They are writers, after all.

I want to fast-forward over the In Memoriam segment, but I can’t. It’s always filled with nostalgic surprises. (“I forgot so-and-so died;”  “I didn’t know he died!”)

Ooh, I forgot Barbra Streisand was going to perform. She’s honoring Marvin Hamlisch (whom I forgot died!), singing Memories. I imagine her voice isn’t what it used to be. But she sounds better than most 70-year-olds I’ll bet. Is she still a gay icon.  I mean, for the younger set. Do young gays study up on the old greats, like Babs, Judy Garland, etc.?

I was thinking that Renee Zellweger’s eyes are so damn squinty and sunken into her puffy face, how does she see out of them?  And lo and behold, Richard Gere held out the envelope for her to read the winner and she couldn’t! LOL!  Queen Latifah had to step in and read it for her.

Oh, goody. Adele won. That Skyfall song isn’t even very good! Now she’s got the G and the O in EGOT. (That’s Emmy, Grammy, Oscar, Tony—very few people have EGOT’s.)

I just saw John Stamos in the audience. What’s he doing there?

Cheers and claps for Quentin Tarintino winning Best Original Screenplay for Django Unchained. (I literally cheered and clapped. I love me some Tarantino movies. He has a weird and wonderful mind.)

Jane Fonda looks good. Like crazy good for a woman that is nearly 80.

Ang Lee wins Best Director over Steven Spielberg and whoever else was nominated. Damn it. I might have to see Life of Pi.

OMG, first the Princess Diary and now Katniss wins. And she was so overcome that she tripped on her way up to the podium. The very gallant Hugh Jackman tried to rush to her aid.

Meryl Streep, you goddess you, presenting a very handsome Best Actor category (discounting Joaquin Phoenix).

Speaking of Joaquin, he looks so uninterested (or is it disinterested?) in being there. He was looking at his nails or something when they announced his nomination and just looked disgusted with the whole thing. So why even show up?

And DDL (that’s Daniel Day-Lewis) just won his 3^rd Best Actor statue, the first man to do that. Method acting has really paid off for him. They better not play him off! He deserves to speak as long as he wants.  [They didn't play him off, and he was damn funny in his speech. Who knew DDL could be funny? Is there anything he can't do? Doubtful.]

FLOTUS (first lady of the US) presents Best Picture to Argo from the White House via Jack Nicholson. That’s unexpected. The Academy must feel like a bunch of boobs for not nominating Ben Affleck for Best Director.

Ben Affleck is doing his acceptance speech for Best Pic like an auctioneer. I think he’s very emotional. Aw, he’s having a moment. I’m getting a little misty b/c I too remember the last time he stood up there when he won Best Screenplay with Matt Damon for Good Will Hunting 15 years ago.  (I looooved Good Will Hunting, and was so happy they won.) Ben was snubbed for a Best Director nod, but he won the whole enchilada. And he won in the court of public opinion. He is a beloved and respected director in Hollywood now. The stink of Gigli and Reindeer Games is all but forgotten.

FINAL THOUGHTS

As always, I enjoyed the show. I’m an Oscarphile and not ashamed of it. I thought Seth did a good job, lots of funny comments, several kind of “inside” for those who have followed all the of the hoopla and press leading up to the big show.  The speeches finally got good when the big winners were finally announced.

I also liked that several movies won major awards instead of one film sweeping the awards. I hate when that happens. The love was shared amongst several deserving films, so lots of movies can now count themselves “Academy Award Winner.”  And I saw almost all of them.  (Damn you, Life of Pi!)

And so another award season comes to a close. What do I have to look forward to now?  Oh yeah—2 Bruno concerts, spring break, a Beyonce concert, a Jewel concert, summer vacation. I think I’m gonna be all right.

Golden Globes 2013 -- Reflections

Time for my annual blog post.  LOL.  But seriously, it seems like I only post a Golden Globes review each January, and I then I disappear.  Blogging is just so time-consuming, and I have so much tv to watch.  (For realz, you have no idea how packed my DVR is!)  Without further ado, my thoughts on last night’s show.

PRE-SHOW OBSERVATIONS
Ryan Seacrest—weird hair tonight.  Too long, too poofy in the front.

These women are impossibly skinny!  I marvel at it every year, but it’s always shocking. 

Jodie Foster looks great.  And shocker, she’s wearing Armani.  (I kid b/c Jodie always wears Armani!)

Jennifer Lawrence (Hunger Games) is so pretty, and I like her dress…except for the weird structured cups under her boobs.

Rosario Dawson (why is she there?) is wearing a lovely blue frock that unflatteringly flattens her boobs.

I’m trying to understand the sex appeal of Benedict Cumberbatch (BBC Sherlock, not to be confused with CBS Sherlock Jonny Lee Miller, aka the first Mr. Angelina Jolie).  Still not getting it.  Pretty sure I never will.

Julianne Moore is always so pretty.  She makes pale look amazing.

Both Halle Berry and Eva Longoria are flashing a lotta leg effectively carrying on the Angelina Jolie leg-jutting-out-of-high-slit tradition of last year.

Apparently P Diddy (or whatever moniker he goes by these days) is close friends with Sienna Miller.  They have pet names for each other.  He’s “she-she” and Sienna is “baby she-she.”  Wha??? (and I left the “t” off intentionally. Deal with it.)

I just squealed when George Clooney came up and hugged Julianna Margulies hello. Aww, Doug and Carol.  Gotta love an ER flashback.

Everyone keeps talking about how cold it is there for the ladies (what with their strapless, high-slitted, sheer dresses), so I have to wonder:  nipple covers?

Stacy Kiebler hanging in there with George Clooney. She may never make it down the aisle, but she has made it to a second season of red carpet events!

How is Lena Dunham good friends w/ Zac Posen?  She’s just now getting famous; he’s been famous (designer) for years.  How do they know each other?  He’s good friends with Natalie Portman, I believe.  That relationship, I understand.  

Oh, goody. Adele is there. She’ll win the freakin’ Globe (best song), and I suppose she’ll win an Oscar this year too.  Hmph.

THE ACTUAL CEREMONY
I love Christoph Waltz’s (Django Unchained, Inglourious Basterds) voice.  His accent is delightful. It has a sing-song quality to it.

It trips me out that Danny Strong (one of the geek trio from Buffy the Vampire Slayer) is a respected Hollywood writer. (He wrote the script for Game Change, the HBO film about Sarah Palin.)

Why does Eva Longoria even get to be there? She was at the Critics’ Choice Awards last week also. And she presented at both.  What is she even doing post-Desperate Housewives?
Has Jon Hamm (Mad Men) ever won anything?!  Emmy, Globe, SAG—anything?  That poor man is a perpetual bridesmaid.

My girl crush J.Lo is as beautiful as ever.  The dress I’m not so sure about, but her face, exquisite.

Ugh—Adele won.  They mentioned that she’s won 9 Grammys.  Bruno only has one.  And here comes that trashy, cockney accent…

Jack Bauer! I miss 24.  Still haven’t deleted the “series record” from my dvr.  I can’t bring myself to do it.

What is Bill Clinton doing there?  Lena Dunham sure is excited.  They didn’t cut to Clint Eastwood.  I doubt he’s excited.  

What’s Alyssa Milano doing there?

Everyone thinks Will Ferrell and Kristen Wiig are hilarious.  Everyone except for the apparently humorless Tommy Lee Jones.

Jennifer Lawrence gave a great speech. She's pretty damn funny, and I don’t think Hollywood has fully spoiled her just yet.  Give it time though.

Anne Hathaway looks really cute with her short, Twiggy hairstyle, and she is very well-spoken.  She sounds smart, and I like that.

Jeremy Irons is sporting tails but thankfully no top hat. 

Lucy Liu’s dress is too big and poofy to share the stage with another presenter.

Matt LeBlanc is still with his homewrecker.

Don Cheadle just oozes cool.

Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger presenting together. They are so old now, but let’s just remember the 80’s to mid-90’s.  Good testerone-driven, butt kicking, gunfighting, exploding times!

Lea Michele is ridiculously tan.  I don’t care if it’s fake or not.  It’s too much.

Claire Danes wins.  My So-Called Life forever!  And she’s not all unnaturally tan.

Jodie Foster seems very fast and loose tonight (probably the alcohol).  Watching her movie montage makes me miss Jodie Foster in movies.  Nell, Silence of the Lambs, Sommersby—love, love, love.  And her arms are amazing!  That is one fit 50-year-old woman.

Wow, Jodie’s speech took a serious turn.  She got the waterworks going for me (and lots of famous folks in the room) with her declaration of love to her ailing mom.  She also confused us all by kinda-sorta coming out…restrospectively and a bunch of other stuff.  It was pretty spastic.  I think she imbibed too much.

Quentin Tarantino just spit out his champagne on-camera.  Was that a bit?

So Ben Affleck wins a Golden Globe and a Critics Choice Award for directing Argo but didn’t even receive an Oscar nod.  But the acting community (and the Hollywood Foreign Press & movie critics, apparently) has really held him up as a great director, Oscar or no Oscar.

I just realized—the original Bennifer is in the same room as Bennifer 2! And Diddy is there too. J.Lo is surrounded by her most famous exes. (Sorry Marc Anthony—you ain’t that famous.) 

Wow, Lena Dunham has a lot of tattoos (on the shoulder and arm, across the back).  I’m sorry but that is just not attractive in an evening gown.  I don’t remember noticing them on her show, and she’s buck nekkid all the time, so they must cover them with makeup.  Wish she’d do the same for red carpet events.  

Very funny that Lena Dunham thanked Chad Lowe, a humorous allusion to Hilary Swanks’ forgotten-thank-you-heard-round-the-world when she won the Oscar for Boys Don’t Cry and forgot to thank her then-hubby Chad Lowe, who ironically was a boy crying buckets during her acceptance speech.  Good one, Lena!

Crazy cute that Ben Affleck got his presenter-wife Jennifer Garner to thank his producers, whom he forgot to thank.  I’ll be sad if they ever break up.

Joaquin Phoenix is becoming less attractive with age—unusual for a man.  But to be  honest, he was never much of a looker.  That was River Phoenix—hottie who died too soon.

Daniel Day Lewis wins. I had the biggest crush on him in the late 80’s/early 90’s, and I still have a soft spot for him.  To this day, I will absolutely watch a movie on the strength of him starring in it, movies I might otherwise have little to no interest in seeing.  

Argo wins best film, drama. Ben Affleck is the most loved man in Hollywood (if you don’t count the Oscars).  Argo f**k yourself! (If you saw the movie, you know what I’m talking about.  If you didn’t see it, get on that.)

Tina Fey & Amy Poehler did a terrific job.  Love those gals, love their shows (30 Rock, Parks & Recreation). I only wish there had been more of them.

That's it, folks.  See ya next year!  (Okay, maybe sooner, but I refuse to make any promises.  Wouldn't be prudent.)
 

Reflections on the Golden Globes Award Show

My first blog in 7 months. How sad is that?! I'm like the world's laziest blogger. Too busy watching tv to blog. Anyhow, it's awards season baby, and I'm off for MLK, so let's do this thing.

I kept kind of a running blog during last night's Golden Globes show. What follows is the fruit of my labor. Forgive grammatical errors. I am not proofreading this whole thing. It's hard enough trying to watch the show & jot down comments simultaneously. I tried to identify some of the actors by their well-known roles to help you laymen out, but I may have missed a few. Do the best you can. Feel free to reference imdb.com for clarification. Here we go:

Stacy Keibler is still hanging in there with George Clooney. He’s gonna break your heart, girl. It’s what he does. She is one tall girl.

Sarah Michelle Gellar (Buffy!) admitted that she let her 2-year-old daughter choose her dress and accessories. She is setting herself up for some cruel jokes on the Fashion Police. Joan Rivers is gonna run with that.

Diane Lane is eternally beautiful. The epitome of aging gracefully.

Meanwhile, Kristen Wiig (SNL, “Bridesmaids”) has horrible bedhead. Did you do it in the limo on the way to the show or what?

I love the way Sofia Vergara says “Vera Wang.” It’s mostly the pronunciation of Wang. This woman is so va-va-voom it’s ridiculous. Tonight she’s a navy blue mermaid. But really she makes any dress look good.

Leo DiCaprio and Mark Wahlberg powwowing on the red carpet. “The Departed” reunion! Man, I love that movie.

I did not realize Matt LeBlanc (“Friends”) was still with Andrea Anders, his “Joey” costar whom he left his wife for. Sometimes “the other woman” actually sticks. It’s been 7 years or so.

Nicole Richie looks very pretty and very…classy. A far cry from “The Simple Life.” What a transformation.

“The Golden Globes are to the Oscars what Kim Kardashian is to Kate Middleton. A bit louder, a bit trashier, a bit drunker, and more easily bought.” – Ricky Gervais (That is a great joke.)

“The Golden Globes are a lot like the Oscars, but without all that esteem.”-- Ricky Gervais (I agree Ricky. You can't take the Globes to seriously as Oscar predictors. They can be pretty random.)

Jodie Foster took Ricky’s overt joke about her movie (and veiled joke about her sexuality) very well. But really—if you make a movie called “The Beaver,” it’s just a matter of time. The jokes write themselves.

Johnny Depp no longer sounds American, having adopted some mysterious accent a la Madonna. We’ve lost another one. I guess he does live in France or someplace, so maybe he’s picking it up from there. Yet is doesn't sound French. Hmmm (scratching head...) The tone is sexy and deep though, and it is Johnny Depp, so who really cares?

It’s so weird to see Jonah Hill all skinny! He’s like a different guy.

Captain Von Trapp (Christopher Plummer) is cleaning up. He won at the Globes and at the Critics Choice Awards. I guess I need to see his movie, “Beginners.” And he’s been married 43 years. In Holllywood. It’s amazing for anyone but even moreso in Hollywood.

It is so endearing that Michelle Williams always brings Busy Phillips (“Cougar Town”) with her to awards shows. She did even when she and Heath were attending together. I love that “Dawson’s Creek” made them besties for life.

OMG—Jessica Biel is there. Why is she sitting next to Salma Hayek? Nevermind—is there a ring on that finger, or what?! We need confirmation.

Why the hell is Kelsey Grammar’s “Boss” show even nominated? And now Kelsey just won. This is why the Globes aren’t as prestigious as they could be. They make strange choices sometimes.

Madonna’s arms are insane! Kinda sexy, kinda creepy. Madge uses big words a lot, which makes her sound very intelligent. She just used “harangued” correctly. Nice.

So many beautiful people…and then there’s Steve Buscemi. LOL.

I bet most of the folks in the room don’t know who Idris Elba (HBO's "The Wire") is or what his BBC show “Luther” is either. The Brits know, of course, but not the Americans. And lots of folks who do know him did not realize he's British. Everyone knows what a fine piece of man-meat he is though. ;-)

Cut to Angelina when Brad’s on stage. What it must be like to know Brad Pitt is all yours…

“My Week with Marilyn” is in the comedy category? I don’t think so. Marilyn may have made comedies, but she lived (and died) tragedy. Duh.

So sweet of Michelle Williams to thank her little girl. She and her daughter always make me think of Heath Ledger.

I hate that the supporting actor/actress is all lumped together for tv show comedy, tv show drama, and tv movie/miniseries. It’s too much!

Not nearly enough Ricky Gervais tonight! He appears sporadically and then vanishes for long periods of time.

I didn’t realize Spielberg directed “Tintin.” So he did a cartoon, and Martin Scorsese did kid’s movie “Hugo.” The greats are stepping out of their comfort zones.

Nicole Kidman is so statuesque. As are Stacy Keibler and Charlize Theron. Amazons.

I need to see this movie “The Artist,” but currently it’s only playing at River Oaks, and I hate that theater. Mainly because parking is a nightmare. It's a frontrunner for the Oscars.

Awww, Felicity Huffman (“Desperate Housewives”) and hubby William H. Macy (“Shameless”) are presenting together. And they did a clever little song. Terrific.

Jessica Lange is boldly wearing a dress with almost her entire back out. That’s a lot of old skin, sister. Ya might wanna cover that up.

Wow, Madonna presents foreign film. Fitting since she is now foreign herself.

Dustin Hoffman is too tan. He looks silly.

Juliana Margulies is beautiful, but that slicked back ponytail is too severe.

Claire Danes wins, but where’s her cute hubby Hugh Dancy? Must be making a movie. Oh no they are not playing her off! You let Angela Chase speak!

Thomas Jane (“Hung”) looks ridiculous in that hat. Is it a fedora? If so, you are neither Justin Timberlake nor Bruno Mars, so give it a rest.

I cannot believe the girl from “Secret Life of the American Teenager” is in serious awards contention this year (for the George Clooney film, “The Descendants”). I guess it’s no stranger than “That 70’s Show” Mila Kunis getting attention last year or American Idol loser Jennifer Hudson a few years back.

There seems to be so much love for Octavia Spencer in the room. Everyone seems genuinely happy for her. And she looks so pretty.

Damnit—I’m caught up to live tv.

Usually you have to worry about the Cecil B Demille award acceptance speech being too long (Al Pacino, anyone?), but this year we have to worry about the presentation taking too long. Sidney Poitier speaks sooooo slowly.

Morgan Freeman is 75?! He looks good, he moves well. He is not what I envision when I think of a 75-year-old man. Sidney Poitier, who just presented his award, is 85. Unfortunately, he is what I envision for an 85-year-old. I just can't believe only 10 years separate the two of them. I thought Morgan was about 10 years younger than he is.

What is with Ben Kingsley’s wife/date? She’s much younger, which is fine, but she needs to cool it with the PDA’s on national tv. Hell, it’s international tv. Earlier she was getting frisky from her own seat, and now she’s literally in his lap. Calm down, chick.

Angelina’s head looks so big on her tiny little neck and body. Her arms are veritable twigs. Eat a sandwich!

And now I keep reaching for my remote and then realize that is a futile endeavor. Blech--live tv.

Perennial awards-magnet Meryl Streep looked better than ever last season, but this year she’s back to looking like crap. The dress, the hair, it’s all wrong. The top of her dress looks like a cowgirl shirt! It’s a good thing she’s the greatest living actress cuz she ain’t no fashionista. The devil wears Prada, but Meryl just wears crap. But she gives good speech. Especially when she's been imbibing...which she has. And by the way, she practically made out with her hubby before we went onstage to accept her award.

The middle Dunphy child Alex ("Modern Family") is wearing a dress with cleavage again! Her 13-14-year-old cleavage was on display at the Emmys and here we go again. What is wrong with her parents?! I don’t like to see that at school, and I don’t wanna see it on live tv either. Cover up, little girl.

Look at Jane Fonda! She looks amazing. From the looks of it, she might still be doing those workout tapes from the 80’s. Eat your heart out, Ted Turner.

George Clooney & Brad Pitt have such a lovely bromance. What a hot power couple they make!

That's all, folks!

10 Things I Love About Bruno Mars

In two short days, I will see my latest love, Bruno Mars, live. I am as giddy as a schoolgirl! I previously wrote a little love blog about him, now I give you a top 10 List of the many reasons why I fell so hard, so fast. Not necessarily in this order (but it's probably about right):

1) HIS MELLIFLUOUS VOICE - His voice is beautiful. Amazing. Angelic. [Feel free to insert your own superlative.] It's just such a pure, effortless voice. The fact that he just opens his mouth, and that heavenly sound just comes out is nothing short of miraculous. He is truly blessed. Now there's someone who really should legitimately thank God when he wins an award because only God could bestow a gift like Bruno's voice. He is compared to Michael Jackson a lot, and it fits. The purity, the power, his high register. I love a man that can hit a high note. His voice for me is perfection. Do some of his songs sound similar? Sure, but guess what--I don't care because his voice makes anything sound good. I want to hear him sing every song I've ever heard my entire life b/c I'm pretty sure he can improve on them all. That's how much I love his voice. It's also refreshing to understand every word a singer says. I never have to look up his lyrics to clarify anything. Just another unusual and awesome Bruno quality.

2) HIS MOUTH - That infectious, heart-melting smile. Those perfectly shaped, impossibly white teeth. Those cute little lips. It's an amazing mouth. It's ironic that he sings, "when you smile, the whole world stops and stares for awhile," because he could totally be singing about himself! I know I stop and stare when he smiles.

3) THOSE DIMPLES - Who can resist dimples? It's like icing on the cake with this kid. Just one more thing to love. I think they're most noticeable when he's singing.

4) HIS EYES - Those big, beautiful brown eyes with heavy-lids, that slant just a bit at the outer corners. Such beautiful (slightly Asian) eyes.

5) HIS MUSICAL ACUMEN - With a voice like his, he doesn't need any other instrument, yet he also plays drums, guitar & piano. And he beat boxes really well! He writes & arranges songs, too. He's a singer, musician, songwriter and producer. He is the whole package, and a gorgeous package it is. (Just so we're clear, I'm referring to his whole person, not his actual "package." Though some pics I've seen suggests he may be blessed in that area, as well. He has small hands but big feet, so it could go either way. What--too blue?)

6) HIS CHARISMATIC & WITTY PERSONALITY - Not only is he hot, but he seems like he'd be a ton of fun to hang out with. He is an awesome interview. Very personable and tongue-in-cheek. He's a quick and clever jokester. He knows what he's working with (see #1-5), and he plays up the image without being egotistical about it. He pokes fun at his talent, his sex appeal, his celebrity, and it's so damn endearing. He's just so damn likeable, never off-putting, comes across as a genuinely nice guy who really appreciates his budding success.

7) HIS JOY WHEN PERFORMING - He always looks like he's having a good time singing & playing. You can't help but smile watching him do his thing. And unless he's singing a sad song, his smile is constant. (I've already discussed how killer that smile is.)

8) HIS CONVICTION WHEN PERFORMING - Maybe we, the Bruno devotees, are just naive, but we believe every word he says when he sings. He sings with such passion & conviction & heart. When he sings "Grenade" acoustically, he barely opens his eyes, and you feel his pain with each crooned word, with each furrowed brow and scrunched face. And when he sings love songs like "Just the Way You Are," you believe that too. If he isn't feeling it, he's got a hell of a future as an actor because he looks and sounds like he feels it.

9) HIS FEDORAS - What he does for a fedora should be illegal. He's bringing sexy back by way of the fedora! His hair is adorable, kind of a curly fro. "Paterican" (Puerto Rican) hair, he calls it. I used to prefer him in a hat, but I've come to love his bare head. The fedora has become his trademark, but he's showing off his sexified rockabilly pompadour style hair more & more lately. He's a super hottie regardless, hat or no hat. :-)

10) HIS ECLECTIC TASTES - He likes all kinds of music. Dance, pop, rock, reggae. It's so sexy that he just loves & appreciates all music. He's a huge fan of 80's music & melodies, particularly MJ & Prince. How hot is that?! I love that someone born in the mid-80's loves the music of that decade so much. He also likes oldies "doo-wop" music, which shows in the simplicity of several of his songs. Apparently he's like a human jukebox. He & his band can play all kinds of songs from various decades on demand. One my fave youtube clips has them doing spontaneous snippets of Tina Turner's "Proud Mary," Survivor's "Eye of the Tiger," and MJ's "The Way You Make Me Feel." They don't get all the lyrics right all the time, but the fact that they can just start playing the song and even sing some of it accurately is mad impressive. Especially because they're only 25!

The fact that someone as genuinely talented as Bruno is actually experiencing success in the modern music biz is an unlikely victory. Maybe it's a harbinger of good things to come. Less autotune, more musicianship. Bruno is bringing real music back. Doesn't hurt that he looks good while doing it. :-D

The Long, Winding Road to Gaga

Some eleven months ago, I bought tickets to last night's Lady Gaga Houston concert. Yes, you read that correctly--eleven months ago. I was unable to get tix to the first two shows, which happened last summer (sold out too quickly). Then they announced there'd be a third show! One small catch--it was eleven months away.

Below is a little walk down memory lane of the arduous journey to attain tix to the Lada Gaga concert, a journey I embarked on over a year ago. I do believe this experience was the catalyst of frustration that birthed my very first blog. Behold the Road to Gaga via e-communications with my "little sister monsters." :-D

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3/26/10 GAGA STILL TBA

why bother announcing the date if you don't have any other details?! just wait til you get your ducks in a row.

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3/29/10 GAGA STILL TBA

still no price or sale date info. frustrating!

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3/31/10 GAGA STILL TBA

just letting you know i'm still checking daily. it'll probably happen over this long weekend. i will continue my vigilance (we will not have a repeat of what happened with the peas, em, fear not). be on the lookout for gaga-texts from me this weekend!

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4/6/10 GAGA DETAILS FINALLY!!!

just posted today on toyota center website (took them long enough!):

Date: Sunday, July 25, 2010
Time: 8:00 PM
Doors Open: 7:00 PM
Ticket Prices: $175, $85, and $49.50

BUY TICKETS HERE
(On Sale Friday, April 9 at 10am)

I'm only game for the cheapest seats. At $49.50, expect the final cost to be in the neighborhood of $60 - $65 (once fees are added). Pricier than I had hoped but still relatively inexpensive for a concert (this is the same price we paid for Pink--i think that total came out to $62 or $63).

I can probably make sure my 3rd period class is "working independently" at approx. 10am on Friday, so I can get the tix. One has to have her priorities straight. :-D

So whadaya think, ladies? I think it could be worth it just for the sheer spectacle of it all. It's bound to be like nothing we ever have or ever will see again. Gaga be a freak!

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4/6/10 GAGA DETAILS FINALLY

okay. i invited [some other girls]. but the three of us are on for sure. and i plan to purchase right away at 10 on Friday. (there's a presale that started today for virgin mobile customers & citicard holders, but i don't fit either one of those). i'm excited now! you know how i love concerts! and i expect cheesecake factory pre-show dinner, obvs! that means we have a date to split chicken fingers on July 25. :-)

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4/9/10 RE: NO GAGA FOR US

that crazy bitch sold out in less then 30 minutes. and she's playing our basketball arena, not some small venue. by the time i actually managed to get thru to the website (maybe 15 or 20 mins after tix went on sale), it was already not giving me seats. i have never (and you how many times i've gone online to buy tix) had a situation like that. not even with all those madonna shows. yeah they sold out fast, but we always got in there b/c we were on it the second they went on sale. today, even that didn't make a difference. this is a true testament to just how large this woman is living right now. she was gonna open for kanye last fall (tour was kiboshed after the incident with taylor swift at mtv awards), and now she's selling out arenas in record time all by her lonesome. unreal.

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4/16/10 STILL NO GAGA FOR US

couldn't get tix again! easily got on website this time, but kept getting "no tickets matching your request available." i don't believe that crazy biyatch sold out 2 shows in a matter of minutes (possibly seconds).

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5/10/10 3RD GAGA SHOW ADDED!!!

There's going to be another Gaga show at Toyota Center. On Friday, April 8, 2011! Talk about early planning! What if she's not hot by then? Maybe she's a freakish fly-by-night act.

Anyhoo, if you're willing to put yourself out there again, I'm willing to try to get tix. I'm less than optimistic (not getting my hopes up) after being crushed twice before, but I will attempt to secure tix. The show is on a Friday, so that's good. Tix go on sale this Friday, 5/14. Who's still in?

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5/14/10 GAGA TAKE 3

tix onsale at 10. i'll let you know how it goes. don't get your hopes up though.

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5/14/10 WE GOT GAGA TIX!!!

took 3 three tries, and we have to wait a year (hope she's still relevant then!), but we have a date for April 8, 2011. yay! it's just us three. [the other girls] bailed. they couldn't commit to something so far away. it's $62 each btw. no huge rush, but soon would be good. :-)

Some Thoughts on the Golden Globes

Disclaimer: I typed up some quick notes while watching the Golden Globes telecast. I started going back over them to fine-tune for publishing, but I gave up on proper capitalization, punctuation, sentence structure, etc. after a while. I have other things to do! So you're just gonna have to deal. I did kindly take the time to actually identify the shows & movies these folks are known for, since I realize most people don't automatically know this useless info like I do. LOL. Without further ado, my thoughts on tonight's awards show:

Yay for Katey Sagal! She kicks ass on "Sons of Anarchy." Clearly they didn't think she'd win b/c her seat is waaaay in the back. Love the joy on Ed O'Neils's face. A nice warm fuzzy for all us "Married with Children" fans. Awww.

Yay for Chris Colfer from "Glee"! His speech made me cry a little when he told kids to believe in themselves & ignore the bullies & naysayers. He was so sweet & overwhelm. Costar Lea Michele was crying tears of joy for him too. Awww.

Joe Mantegna's daughter is Miss Golden Globe this year. She's pretty, luckily doesn't look too much like dad. Whew. (I've never been a fan of Joe Mantegna. Hated the movie "House of Games," and I harbor resentment against the stars & the writer of the film. Been holding that grudge since the late 80's.)

Ricky Gervais (host & acerbic comedian) had the balls to diss "The Tourist" in Johnny & Angelina's face. Can't believe the camera didn't pan to them for a reaction.

Ooh, and a thinly veiled jibe at Tom Cruise & John Travolta. He said Jim Carrey & Ewan McGregor are straight men playing gay in "I Love You, Phillip Morris," which is the exact opposite of some famous scientologists. LMAO!!!

What's with Christian Bale's long hair and ugly beard?

What's with Dexter's red beard (as in why the beard and why is it red)?

Love everyone schmoozing & rubbing elbows during commercial breaks. Best reality show ever?--hearing the conversations a room full of actors have with each other when buzzed on alcohol & Godiva chocolate!

How did Piper Perabo get nominated (for tv actress in "Covert Affairs")? Also "The Tourist", "Love & Other Drugs," & "Alice in Wonderland" in the movie categories? Puhleeze.

Helena Bonham Carter has on two diff color shoes--one green, one red. Weirdo. (And let's not forget homewrecker--she broke up Kenneth Branagh & Emma Thompson and then Tim Burton & Lisa Marie. The wife of every director working with HBC better be on the lookout. Whoa here she comes, she's a maneater.)

Poor Andrew Garfield, stumbling over the word "inspiringly" while introducing "Social Network" clip. Makes you wonder how he made it through all of that rapid-fire Aaron Sorkin dialogue in the movie. It also doesn't instill a great deal of confidence in him as the new Spiderman.

the "true grit" girl got to present with justin bieber. lucky girl! her friends hate her even more now!

jennifer love hewitt--too tan? i think so.

loved ricky g's diss intros--bruce willis (called him ashton kutcher's dad & only listed his less successful movies) & robert downey jr (better known for betty ford clinic & la county jail rather than his hit movies). ha!

standing o for annette bening, such (unexpected?) reverence

commercial break schmooze moment: jesse tyler ferguson ("modern family) & jenna ushkowitz ("glee") posing for a picture together w/ one their phones

yo, sylvester stallone is announcing a best picture nominee. i still love you, sly!

another standing o, this time for al pacino.

yet another win (it cleaned up at the emmys last fall) for hbo biopic "temple grandin." feeling the pressure to see this boring looking movie. at least it stars claire danes, my always beloved angela chase from "my so-called life."

ricky g's banter with steve carrell is always fun at awards shows! ricky accused steve of being "ungrateful" and "killing that cash cow" for both of them by leaving "the office." (steve is leaving the show toward the end of this season; ricky is the show's creator & constantly jokes/brags about living off the show's residuals.)

hmm, the globes don't separate adapted vs. original screenplay. i find that bothersome.

they also lump all tv supporting actor/actress together (comedy, drama, miniseries), which is ridiculous.

oops--the camera cut to someone other than julia stiles (from "dexter") when they said her name.

jane lynch ("glee") gives good speech. she was funny as hell. she is one of my fave famous lesbians (after ellen degeneres & wanda sykes). and little lea michele got all emotional again for another costar. awww.

why'd they have to put two of the few black presenters together? (blair underwood, vanessa williams) i might not have noticed how few black presenters there were had they not shoved two of them out simultaneously! that made it glaringly obvious. not cool, globes.

why is jane fonda making the rounds? she presented at the critics choice awards on friday as well.

kaley cuoco's ("big bang theory") genuine excitement when announcing costar jim parsons as the winner of best actor in a comedy series was so precious. made me like her a little more. (she seems kind of unnecessary on the show, but she seems to love her tv family, so awww...)

melissa leo ("the fighter") seems genuinely thrilled and gratefiul & humbled to be getting some awards attention. i guess she's worked a long time for his. nice to see. (she also won at the the critics' choice awards.)

such pedigree in the director category this year: david fincher ("seven," "fight club," "the game"), david o. russell ("three kings," "i heart huckabees," "flirting with disaster") chris nolan ("memento," "dark knight"), darren aronosky ("requiem for a dream"). wow!

isn't it weird that the guy (ryan murphy) who gave us "glee" also gave us "nip/tuck"? that's a guy with diversified interests.

i hate halle berry. not really, but she's just so impossibly (and agelessly?) beautiful. ditto for j.lo. i swear they look better than ever.

commercial break schmooze moment: emma stone ("easy a") & mila kunis ("black swan") holding each other's forearms & jumping up & down like a couple of teenagers.

joseph gordon levitt is adorable. and he had the best scenes in "inception."

looks like 2011 is shaping up to be natalie portman's best year ever: marriage (recently engaged), baby (currently preggers) & an oscar (she's the frontrunner). cowabunga. i'm pretty happy for that little girl i was first wowed by in "the professional."

i know natalie wasn't drinking (b/c she's preggers), but she was firing on all cylinders with the comic zingers during her acceptance speech (referring to her costar as "mila sweet lips kunis," and saying her fiance is such a good actor for saying he didn't want to sleep with her character in the movie b/c he sooo wants to sleep with her in real life.)

sandra bullock--bangs are too big. don't they itch her eyelids? my eyelids itch just looking at them. but sandy is hanging tough in the halle berry-j.lo "i-look-better-than-most-twentysomethings-even-though-i'm-fortysomething" club. rock on.

ooh, ryan gosling (sandra's former young lover) is up in the category she's presenting. not a chance in hell of him winning, but wouldn't that be interesting if he did?!

commercial break schmooze moment: johnny depp & robert downey jr. chatting. a meeting of weird minds in geek-chic glasses?

recent cancer victor michael douglas in response to his warm reception at the mic: "there's gotta be an easier way to get a standing ovation." there sure is, mike. see: robert deniro, annette bening & al pacino earlier in the telecast. :-)

one last thought: it is jarring just how thin hollywood actresses (and commentators--hello, giuliana rancic) are! they turn sideways, and there just isn't much there. and you can see every muscle, every rib, every shoulder bone, every sinew. it is disturbing. how do they do it? and why can't i emulate just a little of it. just a little, nothing too crazy.

ok, i'm done. typing this up has been exhausting. damn my long-windedness and pop culture fervor! damn, damn, damn.